Episode #019 - Dear Journal

Here's the nineteenth episode where I talk about and share the song Dear Journal off the 2007 Album The Compton Effect by Greydon Square. I don't know if this song was written specifically to relate to those who suffer from mental illness, but it clearly hits home to me.

 

If interested you can find more about Greydon at the following places.

Music

Facebook

Twitter

 

I hope you enjoy. And a big thanks to Greydon for letting me use his song!

Here is the direct download for the episode. (right click and "save as")

 

DEAR JOURNAL

The following entry is based on actual events in my life
So for all those wondering, yes this really happened

Dear journal,
I don't even know what to write
Today was just another really bad day in my life
I feel like cryin' but honestly I done run outta tears
So many thing have happened to me
I done run outta fears
Damn its hard bein  6 knowing it just me
I'm convinced that every one in the world is against me
Why don't these people just stop bothering me?
Would they stop if I swallowed a bottle of Tylenol 3?
Cuz honestly I'm seriously thinking about it
Hell everywhere I go I find me thinkin about it
Damn journal why is this the only option I have?
Other than going back to school and gettin bullied in class
Please help me
You are the only friend that I have
Other than the imaginary ones I've had in my past
You know what? Its probably better to die
I'll write in you tomorrow and let ya know what I decide

Dear journal,
Why do things have to be this way?
Sick of feeling this way I wanna leave this place
Please journal make these people go away
Before I pull a Columbine and they get blown away
Why journal?
Why's me why does it have to be me instead of someone else's child?
Why journal do you not answer my cries
I guess I just deserve to die


Dear journal,
Guess what I got some really good news
I was walking through a park today and found a gun after school
Man I'm excited I don't even know what to do
Should I use it on my self or should I take it to school?
Man this is cool you should see the barrel and trigger
Better yet journal you should taste the barrel and trigger
I know I did in fact soon as I got to my house
I ran straight in to the bathroom and stuck it dead in my mouth
Pulled the hammer back gettin ready to squeeze
Laughin and cryin the at the same time on my knees
But something told me "No, Please don't go"
And while I was hesitating some one knocked on the door
I got scared, took the gun out of my mouth
Put it back in my pocket grabbed my backpack and got out
Smiling cuz I know I'll be better about it
Heading back to my room so I can tell ya about it

Dear journal,
Why do things have to be this way?
Sick of feeling this way I wanna leave this place
Please journal make these people go away
Before I pull a Columbine and they get blown away
Why journal?
Why me, why does it have to be me instead of someone else's child?
Why journal do you not answer my cries
I guess I just deserve to die

The only thing we ever needed was for somebody to love us
Pay attention to these kids
Some of them need help
Help em
Love em
Or they'll end up like me

Episode #020 - Wedding Bells

Episode #018 - Laundry and Gallbladders